We are aware of our grace by a reflection found swimming in the eyes of others. It is in this way the stars find themselves in a pool in my backyard. I have always wanted a pool.
What is she saying when she says has no regrets? That’s what she said. She sounded like she meant it. But why would she say it. Unless to see it affect me. Her words come like a groom chewing a wine glass. They come and I sit wondering if red or white would be better, sipping and watching her type on the pc. I sip and watch and she can’t se me. She cant see me begin to chew the edge from the glass and then swallow her words while she turns.
She turns. It’s a turn that has taken 10 years. Ten log years of turning and looking over her shoulder for the reaction in my eyes. She turns.
Her turn means nothing and everything all at once and she says she has no regrets.
My reaction is all she wants. If she still cares would she says that. Only if within her she regrets and wants to see if I appear to care as well. Maybe a spark.
I chew my glass and hold myself. I know she’s lying.
Today I won’t let her see me. I am not going to give in. I am not going to be afraid. We will not be sleeping together anytime soon.
I always wanted a pool.